How normal can I be? Every minute of my life I am changing, and I can't derail this crooked cart. If I were to die today, I would be left with so many questions in my life. I know that there is someone out there that truly loves me for who I am. I know there is someone that will be honest with me, and they won't hide away all there feelings. I know someone is out there that won't play games with my heart. I am just wondering who that person is going to be. I continue to have dreams about trust, and my heart. Maybe the answer has been in front of me the whole time I just never wanted to accept it. Of course I never hoped that someone would break whatever was left in my heart. Maybe I am to damn nice to people, and they just walk all over me, they treat me like the trash that I am. They throw there words at me like the punching bag that I am. I never thought I was trash, or a punching bag, or someone to walk all over. Each time I get to know people they put me down like a sick dog. The more time I am on the earth, the more I don't understand people. Maybe we aren't worth saving. We are so selfish we would destroy anyone for our wants, even the ones we love. We steal our own families money, we lie to each others faces. We make people believe that we love them just so we don't have to be lonely, and then when there is no need for them anymore we dump them, and move on to the next helpless soul that would do anything for love. I don't believe this is what love means. We hide are hate for one another inside are lips, and smile at them with our crooked teeth. We push away people that our struggling in life, but claim to do God's work. We clam to be bible reading God loving Christians, but after Sunday Service we clock out, and rack up our sins. We use God like an old dirty rag, that we don't want to throw away. We are so sure of our self's, until a Earthquake, wildfires, or Hurricane comes raging at us with all it's force, and we find our self's praying on our knee's, begging to be saved. We make stupid decisions, we are more worried about are belongs then our safety. I am certainly no saint. It seems all I can do is mess my life up. All I can do is fall in line with all the people that would rip my heart out, and not even think twice about doing it.
Here I am caught in this dance, Spinning until I finally get my chance. I’ll put one foot forward, I’ll put one foot back, But until we move together, We will continue to lose each other. So here is my hand, I’ll open myself up wide, So you can forever live inside. Here I am searching for you. So here is my heart I pour it out, So here is my soul I’ll let it go. So here is my life I give it up for you. Here I am to finally lose myself, I know you could truly help. I’ll leave my burdens at the door, I’ll leave my trash at the altar, And I will live this life, The way you taught me. So In my final steps, Maybe our footing wasn’t perfect, Maybe our wording wasn’t all clean, But in the end you were forever here to love me. Here I am searching for you. So here is my heart I pour it all out, So here is my soul I’ll finally let it go. So here is my life I’ll forever give it up for you.
Comments