JACK'S BLOG

Part 1 I just can't help this I am down in the dumps. I am so damn depressed nothing seems to help. I didn't ask for this life to be so hard. I didn't ask to be covered in this doubt. I can only hide and cry for so long. It's only time before I just scream out. I can talk to you and I can yell at you. I don't like the truth anymore. I am just asking please take it away. Part 2 Let me cover these words so you don’t have to hear my truth. I can breath for a second until I am on the run again. I was raised in a dirt awful questionable world. Wondering why is life so angry and real? Murdered from these damaged words. I am walking in a horrible nightmare. Wishing know one knew my ugly ways. Just keep your distance from my horror. I’m droned to falling a part in front of everyone. I bring everyone down with me at the same time. I fight these battles to hold onto what I believe I have left. There is always something there, To kill and bleed out my soul. I walk on hu...

I have this heart full of fear Stuck in this room without windows Why must I fight on? I pick up my head, but I always face down. Tell me why should I walk up right, When I continue to fall? How do you know? Tell me why I should believe that Everything will turn out alright? How do you know? Everything gets worse. When they should be getting better. What is the point of going on, When doing nothing at all? What is holding me down? If I can’t stand up for what is right. What is the point of living. If I keep faking it, What is the point of life? Why should continue to stand tall, When all I do is nothing? I can rise against all the worries. I can stand up for what is wrong. What is the point of believing, When everything I do is wrong? Why do I continue to take these hits? Why can’t I say I don’t hurt no more? When can I say I am alright, And I can say I don’t have to fight? I can wipe this slate clean. I can run away free.

This is not pretend my head really does hurt. I’m having a hard time holding this nervousness in. The world can be so condescending when I am by myself. What is the point of you showing us the way? When that way has reached a numberless of dead ends. I’m the weakest when I’m without you. I can’t do what you say! I’m such a horrible liar. I can’t do it that way! Your so unforgiving when I am broken at my knee‘s. Your so over baring when I am screaming at the ceiling. Your so dishonest when I am asking for the truth. You don’t understand me even when I am at my darkest hour. I am the mess and I can’t be anyone else when your around. I lose my head when there is nothing around me holding me upright. I am the broken mess trapped in this dis-confront. I walk on my toes hoping nobody will find me in this disarray. I'm hiding from the truth and I am sorry everyday. I can't find a way to belong anywhere. Even when I am standing in the right spot. I don’t fit in. I fall away from the be...

Now I may be Dreaming, But where I am going you can’t save me. My loss of everything, So take me away to another place. I have been walking a real long time. What I want is not what’s needed. I hope there is someone because I will be gone for a while. I hope there is someone because I have been down for a while. I hope that this is all for something because I am all for nothing. Now there is nothing keeping my heart from breaking. Now I may be sleeping, But where I am headed there is no coming back. I won’t be real no more, So take me away to a better place. I have been running a really long time. What needs to be done is never important. I hope there is someone because I have nothing left. I hope there is someone because I’m to scared to bleed. I hope there is someone because I don’t know how to believe. Now there is nothing stopping me from losing my soul. Now it is time to let this life go!

Is this what it takes to make an illusion, or Will this ever come to be the truth? Why do I do the things I do? Why do I dream of these horrible things? I just want to know your view. It hurts to know what is not meant to be real. It hurts never knowing what will hurt next. I don’t want you to forget about me. I don’t ever want to go far away. I want to stick around forever. I want to stand up and fight. I don’t want to lay down and die. I want to be more than a weird nobody. I can’t breath on my own. I can’t stand on my own to feet. I need you more than I can imagine. Tell me that everything is O.K! I wish I could say that everything is alright. We can run away and live on forever. Where ever I go the pain follows my soul. Please make it go away from here. I want us to be free from this rule. I want us to run and never think again. I feel like this is my dream, and When I wake my smile will disappear. I want to say hey, everything is great! I want to hold you and talk of the good thin...

We can feel the breaze as it hit our faces. Running so fast, then hop and skip. Seeing stars stumbling to the ground. Spinning in circles and We all fall down. Just so much of this is confusion, and blurriness. We can run and laugh and crawl and crash, but I can’t say who will get up and who will last. There is nowhere to run and nowhere to hide. Close your eyes and reach out far. Call out to me and to everyone around. Stuck with your eyes closed count down backwards. Where are you? Where is anyone? I’m alone in the dark frozen in place. More silence, but no formed base. Tag your it losing to the finish line. We all fall down again, but we are fine. Just continue playing before the end.