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The Truth Shall Set Me Free

I can remember lying awake, Laughing about what feelings I will fake next. I was always tired of thinking about you. I hated everything you did to me. I hated everything I did. I faked my smile. I faked my happiness. I faked my laughter. Most important I faked Love. I can remember saying I love you first. I did whatever you wanted. I never had desires of kids or marriage. I hated all of your ideas. I hated all my ideas. Most important I hated myself. I didn't like what I had become. I couldn't stand your conversions. Everything we did was all a waste. I rarely ever slept well. My head was drowning in nightmares. Yes I cried, and Yeah I wept. What if everything we did wasn't real? All the emotions I didn't feel. I just wanted to feel something good for once. I never wanted to do what you wanted. I never wanted to do what I wanted. When you were Sad, I was pissed off. When you were Happy, I was Sad. Why you were trying to find your life. I was to busy fighting the war inside my head. Most Important I hated myself. This was never a blessing. It was never meant to be. The fights were all because of me. What if I never Loved you? At the time I lied to everyone I knew. Especially the one's closest to me. What if you never knew me? I didn't even know me! I am sorry to have to tell you this, but I think you fell in Love with Depression. You felt pity for Depression. It was never the real me!

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