JACK'S BLOG

I can see the sun shining through the blinds, And hear the birds chirping in the mornings. There is still this smile on my face, And the tears no longer fall. I have never felt so free, The laughter comes so easy. and the days seem so real. Is this my life? It   isn't   what it used to be, I can share all my feelings. But it feels too good to be true, Am I dreaming? Please don ’ t shake me, Cause I might be sleeping. Even though the days are like heaven, I can feel the past lingering around. It is waiting for me to fall back down. now that I have been this far, Are my mistakes forever my scars? I can ’ t forget the shame I caused you, And every disappointing decision I made. So here I am, Still wondering how I got this far. I will spill my tears too you, But this feels too good to be true, Am I dreaming? Please don ’ t shake me, Cause I might be sleeping. now that we are here in this moment, I am glad we fought...

All of this time I have been lost in the wilderness, Hoping that you would guide me in the right direction. I have been following you around listening to your words, And doing what you ask of me, But all I ever wanted was you, And you just never wanted me back. I think it is time for me to leave, And for you to let me go free. I have dreamed myself around this world, A thousand times, but yet I am still stuck here. I am still looking out at the many stars, but your not close enough to be found. The tears could still fall from my eyes, and I can fall down to my knees, but you just seem to turn your back on me. I look past all the deceitfulness, I skip over all the many sins,  but I can't help but lose myself inside of your eyes, And I can ’ t look passed the beauty that shines. I am just a fool hiding behind this foolishness, Here I am still dreaming of this fantasy, but you still want nothing to do with me. All this time wasted I ha...

After all of these painful years, I am still wiping away the tears. I could see you in the other room laughing. I am still wondering, what the hell happened? But as much as I cared. We keep all the doors shut, and we didn't talk about you much. You could be lost but, how could I be worried? The everyday sorrow doesn't seem fair, But how can I still be able to shed these tears? You took the many different pieces of my heart. Your disappearance was just the start, but your ghost still lingers around. All of this day dreaming is leaving my body sick, You kept feeding me your many lies, and I took them in like a welcome basket, I am still wondering, what the hell happened? Did your mouth run it's course? Did your strings get cut? Why walk in with open arms, and then leave without being seen? You stole the beauty inside of me, and left this darkness in its place. What other punishment do I deserve?  I can still see your face all day long. After all of t...

If you’re like me you'll remember that first time you fell in love, and how everything was so simple. In the world of the heart you were a baby, but then something horrible happened and this once beautiful stack of memories becomes your down fall. The years go by and you go through one heartbreak after another and you start to ask yourself, “when was the last time I was actually happy?” After a big break up for me 9 months had passed, and I just wasn't happy anymore. I wondered when was I last happy. It is strange not to be happy. It feels like happiness is this drug and you can only find underground. I wish sadness and loneliness were the drugs, and I was happy most of the time, but instead I am not. The last time I was truly happy was about 3 years ago. I say that because it was before I knew what the broken heart felt like. I was a baby and I enjoyed every minute of being a baby in the dating world. I started to think about the memories and decided to just bring up the gr...

Here are all my flaws, You can hate me for all that is wrong. So go ahead and sing your sad song, But leave me out of the title. Here is the truth, I give this all to you. Here is my cash there isn’t much left, Here are my hopes and my dreams. I give you the truth, let me let loose, Let me show you who I really am. Here is our history, let me lay it at your feet, You can run from our dream if you please, But no, I am not close to being perfect. For all the mistakes I have made, I take all of my words back to the page. The red marker covers each line, Why can’t they all be erased? I wish we could go back to the beginning, But then I remember that I am only human. I am scared when we are all alone, I get choked up on every note. I have this tightness in my chest, And there you go taking the best. I am living off of the dirt I sleep on And my scars still bleed easily. I have these freckles all over my skin, And I burn when I am in...

When I wake up, I look around with this narrow view, I feel so hopeless without you. Our house is getting old and crowded, I can’t feel you anywhere. The ghost of our relationship still floats around stumbling, And bumping into the furniture. The walls are spilling out the tears of our pain. Our happiness still may live and die under the sheets, But something deep inside of me is fight for you. Won’t you let me come up for air? I can show you my still beating heart, And you can crush me if you will, But let me get these last words out.    All of our weight is leaning on my shoulders, And when I lay my eyes on your beauty, I crumble into the many pieces I have become. I am broken, so please don’t you break me! Your focus is slowly being defeated. There goes your honesty… Out from your reality. Slipping off the tiles, Spilling loneliness all over the floors. Our happiness still may live and die under the sheets, But somethin...

It is different when you’re lonely, the whole world is falling in love Everyone is holding hands, While you’re holding your tongue. It is different when you’re desperate, And you’re praying for a fix. You leave your doors wide open, Hoping someone will come right in. It is different when you’re helpless And everyone turns away from you, You try to hide from all of your fears, But you can’t stop the on flowing of tears. We all have it difficult but this is different To be abandon leaves you stranded. It is a shame there is nowhere to fit in, But here we are still living, Even if you’re still dragging along, And you’re still doing what’s wrong. Breathing isn't easy, But He paid for these sins. Now we must fight through them. It is different when you're lonely.