"I am the guy that takes everything to his heart, and believes that out of all the evil in the world, I trust that there is some kind of good. I don't know why. I am constantly wondering why I am this person. I am not saying I am perfect by any means at all. I have my dark moments. There are times when I just want to hit someone, but I never do it. Something recently happened to me that pretty much freaked me out. I did something that I couldn't help. I couldn't stop it at all. It was as if I wasn't myself. Now I feel like I have changed forever from it. The thing I did was I built up this story, this sort of a pain inside my heart, and whenever something comes into my life that I feel is a threat to my life. This pain covers my heart, and I close up on people. Well this happened on Father's Day. The pain came over me, and I didn't want to talk about it. I closed up inside. I didn't want to talk to anyone, not even my father. I hid myself away. I didn't want to get hurt. So it happened, and I feel horrible about it. Well the truth is for some reason I don't feel anything. I have no feeling. I am just blah. I am normal with no reaction. I know I did something wrong. I feel like Dexter. Which is impossible! Maybe you've felt this way before. Maybe it's just for the last couple of days. I don't know really. I have a million questions, and I am still confused about my life."
I'm losing a little bit of me inside. All of the breakdowns drive them to hide. I'm wandering around hoping to find something that will never be true. My mind is spinning away from me. I can't see what's in front of me. I tried to be someone else, but the pain doesn't go nowhere else. I WANT TO BREAK!! I want to fall to my knee's. I want to scream out loud. I can't take this anymore. I'm stuck in this hole, and there is nobody to dig me out. With my back up against the wall, I can't see my dreams when your standing in my way. I'm staring at the future begging for the past. I know the good times, but they don't ever last. I WANT TO BREAK!! I want to fall to the floor. I want to scream out loud. I don't think I can take this anymore! My heart is still beating, but my breathing is getting weaker with all of this weight on top of my chest. I keep on fighting these angels wrestling these demons to the ground. I keep on walking until I los...
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