JACK'S BLOG

This year's List of top Albums will be a little different. To be honest instead of most years focusing on mainly Indie Rock, and last year I added Christian Rock, and this year I spend a lot of focus on Instrumental and Post-Rock. I have found some interesting Music and Albums that I recommend you to check out. I know I haven't been posting a lot this year, but I hope at least you find some music you like. I love finding new music. I am not posting my list as a post, but you can check it out on the Top bar, and I already have some anticipations for Music of 2013. Please tell me what you think. Give me some ideas of what you liked in 2012. But my Favorite Band of this year was The Lumineers . I hope you check them out. I hope everyone has a Happy New Year! www.thelumineers.com

          I have been having this feeling like I don't belong in the church. Every week I am wondering what I could possibly do to make myself known. I am not sure if it is the churches I am picking or what the problem is, but I do realize that these negative thoughts could be because of the Devil inside of my head. "One of Satan's attacks is to try to convince you that you are not a genuine Christian after all." (Jerry Bridges) He is there to make me feel like I don't belong or that I am being rejected from everyone around me. I am sure he wants me to run away from the church and to be angry at God. But I can look at all of these issues I am fighting with inside of my heart and I can see that it isn't all the Devils fault because I have some responsibility in the matter as well. Just as the people that don't step up in the church have responsibility. We shouldn't be so naive to blame everything on the Devil; when we sin, and we have the choice to go

Those old memories are still stained on my heart, and they don't seem to go away for anyone. I pushed aside the torment, and I tossed away the pain. but these days seem all the same. The pains of love, Keeps growing inside my head, This crown of love, I am still wondering where I should go. But it seems I'll never know, and I am still tripping over my own heart.  Through all the agony I'm still standing here. A year ago I was regretting my choices, and now I am suffering from these voices. I got this sharp dull stabbing in my side, and it is carrying me on this heart felt ride. The pains of love, Keeps growing inside my head, This crown of love, What have I become. Let me bow to my knee, Won't you open my eyes to see?  All the people watch my indecision, and they plan on my shocking conclusion. All the women began to beg for my hand, and all the men bet on my life like savages. Won't you let me stop for a moment, just let me shed some

So this is it, I am saying goodbye. And I am sure you will forget about me when I am gone. I will take my doubts and fears and get out of this place. All the days of my life I dreamt of you, But now I must finally walk away. So I am hoping this road will lead me back home, And that all these feelings will fade. My heart has been so cold, And I can’t hold myself up anymore. So this is It, I am saying goodbye, And I am shedding these mistakes, Our path was painful and long, And I have sinned so much, And I am sure I will answer to them when I am gone. It is still hard to breathe in because my lungs are stocked up. It is hard to be real because my heart doesn’t know when to beat. I have been here for so long it is time for me to leave. So this is it, I am saying goodbye.  And I am praying these tears will leave as well.

I can see the sun shining through the blinds, And hear the birds chirping in the mornings. There is still this smile on my face, And the tears no longer fall. I have never felt so free, The laughter comes so easy. and the days seem so real. Is this my life? It   isn't   what it used to be, I can share all my feelings. But it feels too good to be true, Am I dreaming? Please don ’ t shake me, Cause I might be sleeping. Even though the days are like heaven, I can feel the past lingering around. It is waiting for me to fall back down. now that I have been this far, Are my mistakes forever my scars? I can ’ t forget the shame I caused you, And every disappointing decision I made. So here I am, Still wondering how I got this far. I will spill my tears too you, But this feels too good to be true, Am I dreaming? Please don ’ t shake me, Cause I might be sleeping. now that we are here in this moment, I am glad we fought this

All of this time I have been lost in the wilderness, Hoping that you would guide me in the right direction. I have been following you around listening to your words, And doing what you ask of me, But all I ever wanted was you, And you just never wanted me back. I think it is time for me to leave, And for you to let me go free. I have dreamed myself around this world, A thousand times, but yet I am still stuck here. I am still looking out at the many stars, but your not close enough to be found. The tears could still fall from my eyes, and I can fall down to my knees, but you just seem to turn your back on me. I look past all the deceitfulness, I skip over all the many sins,  but I can't help but lose myself inside of your eyes, And I can ’ t look passed the beauty that shines. I am just a fool hiding behind this foolishness, Here I am still dreaming of this fantasy, but you still want nothing to do with me. All this time wasted I have lo

After all of these painful years, I am still wiping away the tears. I could see you in the other room laughing. I am still wondering, what the hell happened? But as much as I cared. We keep all the doors shut, and we didn't talk about you much. You could be lost but, how could I be worried? The everyday sorrow doesn't seem fair, But how can I still be able to shed these tears? You took the many different pieces of my heart. Your disappearance was just the start, but your ghost still lingers around. All of this day dreaming is leaving my body sick, You kept feeding me your many lies, and I took them in like a welcome basket, I am still wondering, what the hell happened? Did your mouth run it's course? Did your strings get cut? Why walk in with open arms, and then leave without being seen? You stole the beauty inside of me, and left this darkness in its place. What other punishment do I deserve?  I can still see your face all day long. After all of t

If you’re like me you'll remember that first time you fell in love, and how everything was so simple. In the world of the heart you were a baby, but then something horrible happened and this once beautiful stack of memories becomes your down fall. The years go by and you go through one heartbreak after another and you start to ask yourself, “when was the last time I was actually happy?” After a big break up for me 9 months had passed, and I just wasn't happy anymore. I wondered when was I last happy. It is strange not to be happy. It feels like happiness is this drug and you can only find underground. I wish sadness and loneliness were the drugs, and I was happy most of the time, but instead I am not. The last time I was truly happy was about 3 years ago. I say that because it was before I knew what the broken heart felt like. I was a baby and I enjoyed every minute of being a baby in the dating world. I started to think about the memories and decided to just bring up the gre

Here are all my flaws, You can hate me for all that is wrong. So go ahead and sing your sad song, But leave me out of the title. Here is the truth, I give this all to you. Here is my cash there isn’t much left, Here are my hopes and my dreams. I give you the truth, let me let loose, Let me show you who I really am. Here is our history, let me lay it at your feet, You can run from our dream if you please, But no, I am not close to being perfect. For all the mistakes I have made, I take all of my words back to the page. The red marker covers each line, Why can’t they all be erased? I wish we could go back to the beginning, But then I remember that I am only human. I am scared when we are all alone, I get choked up on every note. I have this tightness in my chest, And there you go taking the best. I am living off of the dirt I sleep on And my scars still bleed easily. I have these freckles all over my skin, And I burn when I am in

When I wake up, I look around with this narrow view, I feel so hopeless without you. Our house is getting old and crowded, I can’t feel you anywhere. The ghost of our relationship still floats around stumbling, And bumping into the furniture. The walls are spilling out the tears of our pain. Our happiness still may live and die under the sheets, But something deep inside of me is fight for you. Won’t you let me come up for air? I can show you my still beating heart, And you can crush me if you will, But let me get these last words out.    All of our weight is leaning on my shoulders, And when I lay my eyes on your beauty, I crumble into the many pieces I have become. I am broken, so please don’t you break me! Your focus is slowly being defeated. There goes your honesty… Out from your reality. Slipping off the tiles, Spilling loneliness all over the floors. Our happiness still may live and die under the sheets, But something deep in

It is different when you’re lonely, the whole world is falling in love Everyone is holding hands, While you’re holding your tongue. It is different when you’re desperate, And you’re praying for a fix. You leave your doors wide open, Hoping someone will come right in. It is different when you’re helpless And everyone turns away from you, You try to hide from all of your fears, But you can’t stop the on flowing of tears. We all have it difficult but this is different To be abandon leaves you stranded. It is a shame there is nowhere to fit in, But here we are still living, Even if you’re still dragging along, And you’re still doing what’s wrong. Breathing isn't easy, But He paid for these sins. Now we must fight through them. It is different when you're lonely.

If I could change a thing, I think I would have changed everything. If I could have known the truth, I would have never been with you. Twenty-five and I am so tired of this childish love, And all the pain that comes along with all its games. Seems such a waste to throw it all away, But I am who I am, like me or not, But you will never be able to change me. The world has its grips on you, And I am no way getting involved. Today could be the greatest of days, But what would you have changed? All of your wrong mistakes, your bad calls, All your fear and lies, Or are you just so selfish inside? If I could change the way we were, I think I would change everything. If I knew the absolute truth about you, I would have never even met you. Twenty-five to life with all that you did, Is this the end of love, should I give up? And here I am stuck with a broken heart, And busted up sight. These days are blurring together, And nothing seems al

She was the dream I always had, always in the back of my mind. There isn't a day that goes by that I don't think about us. So my heart is filled with regret, She is as beautiful as ever I bet. I can still smell her on my pillow, and in all of my sweaters. I can still see her standing in the doorway, her image just won't fade. And if I could cross that line, I would touch her lips oh so soft with mine. And hold her closer then I ever did before. I would wipe away all her running tears, and scare away all of her fears. I would do whatever I could to keep the peace.  I would be the lover she want me to be. Her beauty exceeds this reality, So is this real or am I dreaming? Oh how I miss her touch, All of her compassionate love. I miss the times we would laugh, But now this doesn't happen. Are these maybe memories? Am I living inside of my head? So are you really here with me, Or am I losing my everything? And if I could break the

"Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand." Isaiah 41:10         Every day we get out of our beds, and we open our doors and walk out in this great big world. There is always the  possibility  to get lost out there, and never return back to our home. We all have our own fears in everyday life, mine for example; is being completely alone. It says that the word alone means; separate, apart, or isolated from others. My entire life I had this fear that one day everyone around me was going to die, and I was going to be left all by myself. The scary thing was that I didn't have any control of it. Then one day when I was kid I moved away from all of my family and friends to a  foreign  place I have never been before. As a child separated from my family and friends I began living inside of my head. The days got weary and the pain of loneliness grew stronger. Each day I

It is such a marvelous light, This beautiful ray still shines during, The darkest part of the night. How selfish are we to take what isn't ours, We build on the beauty of your world. We take down trees and burn them to the ground. We turn what is rightfully yours into a wasteland. We dig until we can’t stand anymore, And we blame you for our mistakes. We are abusing what was once beautiful. I will follow your beauty to the edge, And when I know where you are, it is where I want to be. When I don’t know where you are, you are where I belong. Here I am breathing just to breathe, I am dreaming just to dream. So quick to take advantage of all you give me. Here I hurt because she has hurt me, And I bleed because he has cut me. I am so quick to blame everyone else. Here I am fearing just to fear him, I stay awake because I believe I am free, And do what I want because I think I have the control, But you’re the only one to put me in my pl